-- - not if it works. And also, everyone manipulates people to some degree. For instance, if you dont like one of your colleagues and you still show him/her a smiling face or say hi when instead you want to hit him/her with a bottle, that already is manipulation. Potray somenoe false (showing your smiling face when you dont want to) to get what you want (so they do not come after you and sabotage you in the work place).

I do this and I know I do. You do this and you know you do.

How about sucking up to someone. Ie, listening to hip hop to be 'cool' to fit in with teh cool kids when you dont like the music.

Wanna hear a funny story. Ill tell you anyway lol.

I went to Fitness First to check out their gym. The sales person came up and told me their gym was very good. I asked him he they had a decline bench...he didnt even know what that was. To make a logn story short, the place sucked. But thats ok. What entertained me was that he showed me the membership fees. 100 dolalrs for the first sign up. 70 dollars for admin fee. 600+ for year membership. Then, he asked me if I wanted to join and I asked him how much UQ gym costs. He said it costs 680 ( abit more expensive than theirs). Then he smiled and said 'lemme talk to my manager to see what we can do for you'.

He came back a few mins later and told me: 'guess what??! the manager decided to give you a special deal, he will waver the sign up fee so you only pay the membership fee! but ONLY if you sign up today!!'.

I knew all of his pathetic sales tactics and this was when I stepped in to ruin his orgy of treachery.
Me: 'first you didnt really go talk to your manager, ok pal. Second, you said I only have to pay membership fee but you oinly crossed off the first time joining fee, but not teh admin fee, so I still have to pay 70 bucks ontop of the memebrship right? That makes it more expensive than UQ gym. Third of all, UQ gym is only 680 for non students. For student it is $435, and their gym is TWICE that of yours. Have a good day."

I think I taught that son of a bitch a good lesson. But this type of garbage is everywhere. Sadly, it is everywhere because it WORKS on the average joe.
But i do agree with you "I don't think you should ever have to change even a morsel of your character to suit a deceptive situation. "

Over the past month or so, I have made some major consessions to the way I treat others. My new social policy is basically: I don't think you should ever have to change even a morsel of your character to suit a deceptive situation. " If I dont like someone, I am not even polite, but only if I dont 'need them'. So baiscally, the people I DO talk to are the people I think are worth keeping and that i consider friends.

When I first moved into my new place, I knew my landlord was an intrusive old hag and I thought I codl deal with it. i can't. She comes into my room withotu knocking repeatedly, interrogates me abtou where I have been and when I came home, and teaches me lessons abotu eating less meat, more veggies and fruits, etc. I put up a fake smile everytime, and stil do it today, because her rent is teh cheapest I can find.

Staying true to my character in this case would have a high cost (literally), so I have not made any drastic moves to repel her, except keeping a good distance. I think that as long as she keeps teh occiasional free fruits coming and teh cheap rent, I can put up with her intrusions. This fit sdirectly into the category of manipulation for self gain.

oh man, sorry to hear that your new landlord is so nosy. I don't mean to get too personal, but I think she might be acting even more 'hospitable' since she knows what you've been through recently? Maybe she feels some strange obligation to be extra accommodating towards you. I don't know, motherly instincts are strange.

Note-form:

- you're robbing someone of their right to the truth
- you're depriving yourself of your self-respect
- you've probably failed to convey any persuasive reasoning

And finally:
- this beneficial outcome is probably only beneficial for the deceiver, otherwise the poor victim probably would've gone along with it in the first place

Not a fan.

true, true, true and TRUE.
I'm not usually one to "shun" people out of my life, but after my sessions of so-called advice with this person, I couldn't bear to be in such a toxic friendship. Some people have ways of twisting evil scenarios to seem innocent; it's all a matter of perspective, I guess.

however, what if najin, you found yourself in this circumstance: if those hot shoes/heels you blogged about earlier were the last pair in the store and on sale, and yes,you'd look to die for in them, but there was a woman telling the employee she wanted them. would you try to get them? what if he were a boy/man and you just happened to be super cute that day and gave him an extra nice smile that got you those shoes over the other woman. would that be manipulation?

now that the fun is over, i think you'll be just fine in your effort to not manipulate anyone. when you tend to want something, you're pretty good at doing it najin.

HAHAHA! If that's classed as manipulation...oooo, I'd bat those lashes and huskify my voice 1000 times over for the cause!

then, after shafting each customer & with my glistening purchase in hand, I'd give them this look as I'm walking away:

Absolutely disagree.

There are a few that are part of the ruling class and there are many that are part of the ruled class. I hope that the ruling class serves its people and most of the times...they do (being optimistic here people). Many times we are manipulated and even more times we have no idea that we've been.

Ruling class of people--do you mean those who are more authoritative and proactive than rest? I'd like to think even people with those traits still have the decency to acknowledge that manipulation is wrawwwng.

Yeah, I'm sure there are plenty of times we were oblivious to being manipulated. I still don't see how that makes it okay for people to manipulate, however. People deserve the right to know what's going downnnn.

damn you captain kirks of the world!

You're kidding?!

You think the average person wants to know whats going on? hell, im happy that my garbage is taken away every week, that theres trashy reality tv shows on and what shoes im going to buy...

That's not the best comparison? It's more an issue of letting someone if they wanted to. e.g. If I wanted to know exactly what the city's budget for garbage collection is, I should be told truthfully.

Otherwise, we're all cool like the Fonz.